Some people find solace in eating, but I find it in the act of baking. Something about the precision that's required soothes me. I like reading a recipe printed on stained paper, tracing the ingredients with my finger while I scan the cabinet for various sugars and flours. The constant measuring makes for a quiet kitchen that's only interrupted by the occasional thunk of a lid coming off the sugar canister or the tinny whine of fork whipping eggs into a froth. I love the clean way the knife slides across a heaping cup of flour, knocking half of it onto the countertop and leaving a neat, level measure behind, or the way the sugar pours hard and fast. When I cook, I clean as I go, transporting measuring spoons to the sink or wiping the counter down after each step. When I bake, though, I leave a huge mess behind, spilling enough flour on the counter to make snow angels from, slinging slick butter wrappers, cracked eggshells and bald lemon rinds into a soggy pile. I walk around with chocolate smudges on my forearms and drying batter on my jeans. All my energy is trained on the preparation. It's not until I pop my creation into the oven that I turn a critical eye to the havoc I have wreaked. Still, a quick swipe with a wet cloth and a few strokes of the broom and all is right again. At least in the kitchen.
This weekend I was forever on the verge of shouting or crying. I won't pretend that watching over someone who is unwell is harder than being the one who's suffering, but it is its own kind of madness. If I couldn't escape the four walls of our apartment for long, I could at least tuck and run into the kitchen for an hour of calm labor. I didn't want something that required too much thought to make; my mind needed to wander. I craved something that was simple and good, not a masterpiece that would bring me no comfort to eat. So I called my friend L. and asked for her crumble. It seemed the perfect thing to make when life was doing just that around me.
Apple and Pear Crumble
Serves 4-6
In the world of crumbles, there are two kinds of people: those who like fruit with a bit of topping, and those who like topping with a bit of fruit. I fall into the latter category, and so this recipe makes for a lot of crumble topping. If you want to adjust for less, cut it about in half, or chop up another apple and another pear and upgrade to a larger casserole dish. Either way, if you don't serve it with ice cream you are a heretic; I will pray for your soul.
5 TBSP butter
1 TBSP sugar
3 medium apples, peeled, cored and cut into 1-inch pieces
2 medium pears, peeled, cored and cut into 1-inch pieces
1/2 cup oats
1/2 cup flour
1/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup almonds, roughly chopped
1/2 TBSP cinnamon
pinch of salt
Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Melt 1 TBSP butter over medium heat in a saucepan. Add the tablespoon of white sugar and apples; stir and cover. Let cook five minutes, stirring once or twice. Dump into a pie plate and add the pears. In a bowl, mix the oats and flour. Work in the remaining 4 TBSP of butter in small pieces with your fingers until the mix resembles a coarse, nubby meal. Add the brown sugar, almonds, cinnamon and salt and toss. Pour over fruit and bake for 30-35 minutes.
Watching someone be sick is horrible.
But Catherine you definately still need to do things for your self, so I am glad that you are taking the time out to make delicious looking apple and pear crumbles :) Even better if you can convince mr FM to have a bite ;)
Posted by: clare eats | February 12, 2006 at 10:35 PM
(sigh) I wonder if gobbling up nearly half of the crumble, not to mention a big scoop of vanilla ice cream, could be considered doing something for myself? ;)
Posted by: Catherine | February 12, 2006 at 11:55 PM
This sounds like good comfort food. I can just about taste the cold vanilla ice cream melting down over the warm fruit crumble. Yum!
Posted by: Mom | February 13, 2006 at 04:03 AM
Yes, eating half a crumble totally counts as doing something for yourself! Why does healing have to be so complicated? At any rate, the crumble looks YUM and I wish I had a snow day today to make it. (We have 26" of snow in Central Park! WHY don't I have a snow day?) I will dream of this crumble during my snowy commute to work this morning.
Posted by: MIna | February 13, 2006 at 04:06 AM
Mom -- it was purty good.
Mina -- 26"? That's all? You're a wuss. Put on your boots ;)
Posted by: Catherine | February 13, 2006 at 08:40 AM
This looks, and probably tastes, awesome. Why add the pears later? Do pears cook quicker than apples?
Posted by: Cyndi | February 13, 2006 at 01:19 PM
Cyndi -- umm, my pears were really ripe, so I was afraid they'd melt away to nothing in the hot butter and sugar. Even if you're using less ripe pears, I just don't think they need that extra step. But if you don't mind them turning to a fruity stew, you could certainly toss them in there.
Posted by: Catherine | February 13, 2006 at 01:52 PM
Finding solace in the act of baking?
What's your secret? I'm the world's worst baker and never seem to have the smarts nor the patience for the exacting nature needed.
I can't wait to make this recipe! (ok, TRY to make this recipe!)
Posted by: matt armendariz | February 13, 2006 at 05:18 PM
Matt -- I'm the kind who really likes to follow directions so I don't have to work too hard. And I can't do anything fancy like a souffle. But this -- this anybody can do. Cut up some fruit, who cares exactly how big, throw it in a pie plate and dump some stuff on top. The hardest part is working the butter into the flour; just keep the butter cold and work in small pieces. And if you fuck it up, who cares? It's butter! Just dump some vanilla on top and eat. p.s. Really like your site...will continue to check it out.
Posted by: Catherine | February 13, 2006 at 06:47 PM
What type of apples did you use? we have used granny smith and it looks yummy!
Posted by: Renee | May 31, 2007 at 08:51 PM
Hmmm, that is a great question. When I bake I usually go with Granny Smith, too, but I have a feeling I just used what was around, which would have been Fujis or something sweet. Go with the Grannies, I think they'll hold up better.
Posted by: Catherine | June 01, 2007 at 09:18 AM